I veered off the path I had walked for thirty-seven years, but this says nothing about its beauty or validity. In February, 2008, teachings that were completely new to me entered my life and cracked me open. They may not be right for someone else, but they are–clearly–just the nourishment required for this body-mind.
How do I know this? I am deeply happy, and this is not a happiness that comes and goes with the whims of life. This peace remained the ground when I was terribly worried about my son’s health, and while I waited to hear if the lab had found cancer in my body or not. A temporary kind of happiness arose when I was told that I did not have cancer, but that was a layer on top of the underlying, steady, acceptance of life’s unfolding.
I did not give up my previous practice or walk away from it; it fell away all on its own. This was completely unexpected and shocking to me, and I grieved for months. I remember thinking again and again, now what? Now how shall I live?
© Amrita Skye Blaine